Movies that will Inevitably be made

Fuck Death Argh Kill - Self explanatory.

A Selection of George Bush's Speeches during his Presidency, 2001-2009 - An ill conceived conceptual comedy compromised of reactions from people groaning, shaking their head in wonder, and averting their gaze from the Television or computer monitor lest they have to watch a grown man embarrass himself so badly.

Jack Smithing: Representative of Congress - About an uber rich member of the US congress, just like nearly all of them, stays uber rich all during his conflict of interest free years as a congressperson. Roger Ebert described this movie as the type of movie you "want to throw shit at the screen," and "wonder aloud that the country you live in is a corrupt, fucking disgrace."

Cocaine is Awesome - A propaganda piece by Cocaine Lobbyists. It extols the virtues of Cocaine use while downplaying the negative side effects or tries to make the lesser negative side effects as the only problem with Cocaine addiction. Like: "... and the worst thing about the aftermath of a 3 day Cocaine Fiesta is... nose bleeds!" Then the hollow laughter of the soulless.

Braying Donkeys - All about the stupid people who do stupid things underneath my second story apartment window. All they do is talk loud and about nothing. They never say anything interesting ever! And when I try to follow what they are talking about, I get lost in the banality of it all. They speak a dialect of English whose intricacies I have not fully explored. The inane dialect of the English language. Ya hear that, space fillers!!!

Requited Love - A (sigh) heartwarming movie that interweaves the lives of couples who have found the right person in the form of their best friend. Fuck this movie! Sorry, by all accounts, it's lovely.

Movies I Would Like to Make: More...

Bloodless Coup - Political comedy-drama where everyone gets fed up with the sitting President and takes over the 'White House." Could be any country. ahem.

Cactus in Your Armpit - this is mostly from a hallucination I wrote down. Something to do with not putting a cactus under your armpit and teaching one's sister German from a five inch German to English bible. But by doing so, you are making her retarded. Pathos will inevitably ensue.

This last one is more serious: I call it Slow Hole to China. Here is an excerpt:

... The company could afford only 34 days off a year for any employee. Though, Cassie went missing for more than a month, she was actually doing company business. That particular bit of business was for her to set up a "hole to China" office in the federal government super structure. What she actually built, did something else entirely. It would periodically, through its scan resistant programming, plant false information. That false information, always starting at infinitesimal, slowly over 4 to 4.3 years to disintegrate the system. After that, all the work that had been done with the system it will amount to absolutely nothing. So even the accurate information inputted into the system is now wrong. Because Cassie and the company would be obviously implicated, they made sure Cassie only supervised the physical construction of it, not its software or how or when and why it got its information. What the Federal Government will never find out is that the physical construction has the built in 'infinitesimal' wrong information. So the structure itself provides the 'hidden' built in 'software.' Which is actually hardwired and not software at all but a feature of the structure, "the Slow Hole to China."

As soon as other software gets uploaded and the system implemented, the problem* will be there. Right at the same time the first button is pressed to implement the government sanctioned software. So, even if they discover it, right away, they will think its the software. So, they will try new software and again the problem recognizes the difference and now, will 'find' a blind spot to start its unraveling of the system.

So, what do you think? The last one is a work in progress and looks to be either short story material or even novel or novella material. Who knows?

Movies I Would Like to Make: A Synopsis

Shitty Thoughts About You - A light hearted, yet mean spirited romantic comedy.

Killed by White People - six day long documentary about people throughout history that have been killed by white folk.

Viruses - About a sick man. A very, very sick man.

Post Modern Gun Owners - movie that depicts gun owners killing people in a recklessly but they are aware that they are behaving in a stereotypical redneck fashion and make fun of themselves in a dry, witty, urbane way.

Dead Doctor's Delivery - about an un-dead doctor going into stand-up comedy with terrible delivery. The drama is about his struggles. His painful, in minutiae struggle to perfect his delivery of jokes. Painful, in minutiae, delivery of un-dead observation styled jokes.

Citizen Krap - like Citizen Kane only the guy's name is changed to Krap. And then document the inherent downfall of someone with a lousy last name.

Hugo Chavez Overdrive - Hugo Chavez in a never seen before side of him. Driving Ferraris, drinking, snorting coke, snorting oil, solving crimes, and all the while governing Venezuela above reproach. He obviously now as acceded to US demands and sold out the poor people of his country. Mostly this movie is him driving and shooting disenfranchised poor people.

Ditch Livin' - independent style movie with bittersweet denouements about people talking, laughing, crying, and pathos; but everyone lives in the ditch.

Imagining Mohamed - a movie for infidels that imagine Mohamed. What he would have worn and looked like even though Islam strictly forbids images sculpted or drawn of the Prophet, they cannot take away the infidels powerful imagining of him.

PussyAssSex - porno with a wimpy guy having sex with various people; anal and vaginal. But done in a milquetoast style by the protagonist.

Deadly Till Dawn - Nocturnal lemurs run amok in this heady thriller about lemurs who are big and stuff and do things to people who are sleeping. Perhaps there be a scene where the head lemur is raping a hot chick.